Speeding drunk

A drunk is driving with his parrot through the city and his car is weaving violently all over the road. A cop pulls him over.

“So,” says the cop to the driver, “where have you been?” “I’ve been to the pub,” slurs the parrot and the drunk smiles.

“Well,” says the cop, “it looks like you’ve had quite a few.” “He did all right,” the parrot says and the drunk smiles. “Did you know,” says the cop, standing straight and folding his arms, “that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?” “Oh, thank heavens,” sighs the parrot. “For a minute there, I thought I’d gone deaf.”